This is a site of uplifting and thought provoking posts

Last night I once again watched the movie “Stranger Than Fiction”. The movie is really great and one I especially enjoy as a writer.

In the movie, Harold Frick, played by Will Farrell, starts hearing a narrators voice in his head pretty much narrating what he is doing/thinking as she types away on her novel. Unbeknownst to the author, Harold is actually real and what she writes about him is actually playing out in his life.

Finally realizing he isn’t really crazy, Harold tries to find out what is going on and eventually comes to find out he is unwittingly part of the authors novel and that she always kills off her hero/heroine. Harold finally meets up with the author and asks her not to kill him off. Undecided, she hands him a copy of her draft to read. The English professor Harold has sought help from (Dustin Hoffman), after reading her draft of the book convinces Harold he must die as the work is a masterpiece.

Harold eventually accepts his fate and tells the author he is willing to die and that he loves her novel. In the end, the author changes he mind and re-writes her ending even though she knows it lessens the greatness of her work. She does so because she just can not kill someone who is “so noble”.

As an author I have killed off a number of my characters (not the hero). Even though they are fictional, after spending so much time with them they almost become real. As such it is painful to kill them off even the dastardly ones.

But what if they were truly real? Could we kill them off even though we know that doing so makes for a great read and that not doing so could keep us from writing the next greatest American novel?

I know I couldn’t. The truth is, once we get to know someone our feelings about them will often change and generally for the better even if our opinion of the person was very poor before hand.

There was a musical group back in the sixties called Friend and Lover. Their cover song was “Reach out in the Darkness”. My favorite line in the song started out something like, “I knew a man that I did not care for, and then one day this man gave me a call. We sat and talked about things on our mind and now this man he is a friend of mine”.

I find that sentiment to be so true. We can never know enough about someone until we sit down and talk with them. It is so easy to pass judgement on people we don’t really know and to demonize them.

All too often I hear and read people’s remarks to the effect that “I wish that person would die” or “someone ought to kill that person”. Whether serious or not such comments are sad. Sure some people and their actions can definitely infuriate us, but I think what we should do is comment on the actions of the individual that we don’t like rather than demonizing the individual and to want them to die.

Bottom line, I absolutely couldn’t kill a character off if I knew they were real. It’s tough enough even when I know they aren’t.

Thanks for checking in this week, pray for peace and hope we all try to get closer to someone we have either become a stranger to or been too critical of.

Aloha, Paul

I am fortunate to currently be working at a surf shop in Jacksonville Beach, FL. For the enjoyment of our shops customers, we run various surfing videos throughout the day.

I was watching one yesterday when I came to realize the one thing those great surfers in the videos had in common. They all seemed to have a superb sense of presence. Call it locked in,  focused, in the zone or whatever but in the final analysis, besides being extremely gifted athletes who work diligently at their craft, the thing I believe that separates them from the rest of the crowd is their sense of presence.

And its not just great surfers who seem to have this quality but I believe it is so with all great athletes as well as great scientists, painters, actors, world leaders and many others.

It seems as though when they are doing what they do they are totally in the moment and fully focused and invested. All other distractions seem to be blocked and somehow don’t penetrate their consciousness. It’s like see the ball, be the ball, see the wave, be the wave. Because of these attributes, the surfers in the films seem to be in the best spot on the wave and time and again make the hairy drop in’s, make the right decision as to when to cut back or drive down the line and invariably get the best barrels of the day.

Somehow this doesn’t come easily for me. I’m not sure if its due to my having a attention deficit disorder or what but staying in total focus has always been a fleeting thing for me. When I write I can only do so for about an hour or two before I’m either drained or fidgety. The same goes when I’m painting or playing sports. I’ve always tended to be streaky in sports, at one moment totally focused and in the zone and the next minute lost in a cloud.

It’s when I am fully focused though, either when doing sports, art, writing or simply listening to a friend or enjoying a beautiful day or event that I seem to be the happiest.

The shot of me on the wave in the attached picture was one of the times recently where I was totally in the present and focused. There was a small swell in the water that morning with hardly any plus sets to be found. As I stared out to sea I saw this one nice set (well at least bigger than anything else that morning) wave rising on the outside and I didn’t want to miss it.

I paddled over to where it looked like it was going to peak and fortunately ended up in just the right spot. I was able to pop up quickly, snap the board into the curl just ahead of the collapsing lip and gain speed quickly. I pumped the board for more speed and later down the line managed to get covered up then make it back out onto the shoulder.

For that brief time I realized what it felt like to have presence. I was so focused that I didn’t notice the photographer on the beach shooting the sequence or worry about who was watching or if I was going to wipe out.

As I thought about the subject of presence further I realized that we would all do much better if we lived in each moment fully. I’m not just talking about sports but also about time spent with friends and family, in nature, at work and at play or whatever it is that we are doing. All too often we miss the best part of an experience because we are distracted by one thing or another or thinking about the next thing we are going to do.

With all  the cool things the new technology brings with it, it can also be a huge distraction that can take us away from the present and rob us of a potentially treasured moment.

My hope then is that we all create a better sense of presence for ourselves. Although it may not guarantee we make it onto a sports video or make us a world champion, at the same time it might help us to be better and happier individuals.

Thanks for checking in this week and I hope your coming one is a great one.

Aloha, Paul

Special thanks to my friend Eddie Pitts of the 911surfreport.com for the photo

For my newly released novel I use the term Waves of Fate for my title which makes me ponder are we really bound by simple fate or do we drive our destiny through our every day actions.

The topic is certainly one that has been debated since the dawning of civilization and one that is not easily proven one way or the other.

In my follow up novel to my first one entitled “The Nonconformist”, my hero is dealt a number of heavy blows that seem to have come in waves. One of them alone could be cause to throw up ones hands and give up but how does one move on from so many so close together?

It would be easy to simply give up and feel doomed to the seemingly certain dismal fate and certainly many people do as a result of seemingly far less trials, tribulations and disappointments. One also has to ponder why one is it that some men and women do give up while others seem to be able to lift themselves up from the ashes and carry on and thrive.

Certainly faith seems to play a strong role but I believe it is also driven by an inner sense of strength and a belief that there is a silver lining laying just ahead if we keep pushing forward. I also believe it is easier to get past things with the love and support of family and friends who encourage and support us.

In my novel my hero Jon Lewis, after enduring his waves of difficulties, somehow, after sinking into despair, finds his inner strength and seemingly tempts the hands of fate in his quest to reconnect with a long lost surfing buddy, a half-sister and his Hawaiian friends including a potential former love interest.

It might be easy in the end to look back and say, “It was my fate that things ended up the way they did” but again I don’t believe we could ever say this with any degree of certainty. If Jon had done nothing and just accepted his fate would the outcome have been his fate and destiny? Or, did he create his destiny and fate through his moving forward and taking action?

I’m still not certain, but as for me I’d feel a lot better about whatever situation I find myself in knowing I didn’t throw up my hands and accept whatever and instead tried to create my destiny.

Thanks for checking in this week and my hope is that you, as the slogan went in the movie “Galaxy Quest”, “never give up, never surrender”. Take care and I hope to see you back here again soon.

Aloha, Paul

P.S. Please check out both of my novels at Amazon and Amazon Kindle where they are available for purchase. I also have copies available for those who are interested.

We tend to hold onto fond memories from our youth of special places and events. When remembering those things a smile generally comes to our face and we are often filled with a sense of well being and nostalgia.

It may be a place we visited on vacation, a family or friends home or simply a secret place that was ours alone.

For me, it was the old log cabin vacation cottage my grandparents owned for a time on Deep Creek Lake in Maryland which I recently painted to help hold onto the memory of the place and it’s importance in my life’s remembrances.

For me it was a safe port in the often violent storm that was our home growing up. With grandparents, aunts, uncles and assorted other guests in attendance, there were too many caring eyes on us for tensions within our family unit to boil over or to allow our parents to get away with the things they were allowed to with no one else present.

This allowed we kids to let  our guard and hair down and simply enjoy being kids. The same also seemed to be true for our parents who seemed to be on their best behavior during our infrequent but enjoyable visits.

As a child, the lake and time with relatives gave us countless activities to enjoy. There were cruises and fishing trips along the lake in our grandparents skiff and Chris Craft speedboat, family card games at night and time listening to the adults tell stories from their youth. There was great food cooked up by our beloved Aunt Ethel and for me there was the endless checker matches with my grandfather that I most enjoyed even though I never won against him even after he suffered his stroke.

My grandfather was a champion fly fisherman and tried his best to teach us how to fish properly. While I loved fishing with the him and the family I honestly sucked at it. I remember one time standing on their dock for what seemed  like an eternity without getting a single bite and then being completely humiliated when my younger sister walked out and as she was lowering her line a fish literally jumped out off the water and onto her hook. At the time I was demoralized by it but in later years it became one of the stories that was told and retold and eventually became only a funny memory for me.

That seems to be the way things go with such memories and places. In the end, we are only left with fond memories and nostalgia.

We all need such safe havens from the storms of our lives and it behooves us all to create such places for our children, grandchildren and relatives if at all possible. I know it’s easy at times to let bad memories take over our consciousness and to become angry and bitter. As such it helps to try and remember and hold onto the good memories also.

I believe that if we do we will all be a lot happier and healthier and there will be many more safe ports in this world.

Thanks for checking in this week. Take care and I wish you the best until next time.

Aloha, Paul

Ok, I’ll admit it, I count things. I don’t do it on purpose so I suppose it has to do with something I was born with (God only knows what makes my funny little brain work). I count steps I take, strokes taken while paddling to the outside, the amount of times I pedal my bike and I also count cards (I’m sure they wouldn’t like me in Vegas at the card tables). These are just a few of the things I count but I’m sure you get the picture.

I also can add things up quickly by just looking at numbers. I seem to know things like scores from sports contests before they are announced and often have premonitions of things that eventually happen.

As I said before, these aren’t things I consciously do, I just unwittingly do them.

I suppose that’s why I like painting, surfing and sports of all kinds. While I’m in the middle of doing those things I suppose my mind is so focused on the task that there isn’t time to count.

It would seem then that I would also be one to keep track of things but for some reason I don’t. I just doesn’t seem logical to me to do so and I suppose it’s also because I’m a bit of a free spirit and fly by the seat of my pants for the most part. I’m also certain that if I did I’d most likely drive myself nuts.

I knew a surfer who lived on the Outer Banks. The guy was cool but for some reason he kept a log of every surf session he ever had. He not only kept track of the conditions but also the weather, the rides he took, who he surfed with along with other little factoids of his session.

At first I thought it was pretty cool and even considered doing it myself but in the end it just seemed like way too much work. Just think, I’ve been surfing over 50 years now. Now lets say I surfed on average 75 days per year. If that were the case, I’d have surfed 3,750 times. Who could ever have the time after it was all said and done to read that much stuff.

It’s kind of like people who have thousands upon thousands of digital photos in their devices. How could you ever have the time to view them all. I have only about a hundred in mine and I feel overwhelmed.

It just seems to me that we are keeping track of way too much stuff. People have home monitoring systems that they check constantly throughout the day, they have monitor wrist bands that tell them how much they have walked, breathed, burned off and who knows what else. Some people even check their stock portfolio endless times per day week.

I honestly don’t want to know what’s going on with my home all day, what the kids or the dog are doing and if there is someone loitering outside my home. I also don’t want to have an up to the minute analysis of my health. In the end it would simply overload me with information and make me paranoid. Besides, I already am way too busy counting things.

Thanks for checking in this week. I hope you have a great weekend free of having to keep track of so many things and simply living in the moment.

Aloha, Paul

“The mind is a terrible thing to waste Paul”. That’s not really where I was planning on going with this post. I suppose the voices of teachers and parents past are still ringing in my ears.

Lest I digress, and go down a very painful road, the idea of matter versus mind came to me during several surf sessions of late.

I recently had shaped for me the board in the picture. It is a 6’3″ stinger rocket, modified single fin, channel bottom board. I pride myself on being able to ride almost any shape that comes my way. In my quiver I have a 5’11” performance twin fin, a 6’2″ baked potato fun shape that I shaped myself, a 6’4″ thruster and a 6’8″ high performance thruster for big surf. I also sometimes ride long boards that I borrow for those days when that’s all that really works.

When I set up the fin on the new board, Tony of COS where I work, advised me to set the fin way back so it wouldn’t be too loose. Unfortunately I didn’t listen to Tony as a guy that rides updated single fins said it would work best moved forward and also because I thought I could handle the speed and looseness of it. (mind/matter)

Well, when I dropped in on my first wave and went for a big cutback I obviously couldn’t handle the speed and the board literally shot right out from under me. Yes Tony got in a good “I told you so”, and I have since moved the fin back and am now slowly getting the board wired. I guess it wasn’t named the Stinger Rocket for nothing.

I also detest wearing a full wet suit so I try and wear as little rubber as possible when I feel I can. Fortunately we have had a pretty mild winter with water temps in the low to mid sixties for much of the winter and as such I’ve only worn my full suit a hand full of times.

Unfortunately we had a recent cold spell that brought the temps back down into the upper fifties to low sixties. Despite that knowledge, I decided to paddle out this week in only a light spring suit top. Needless to say, that morning I froze my butt off. I stayed out for about an hour and a half and although I got some good rides, the coldness made my back lock up that evening and It’s just beginning to loosen up now. (matter/mind)

I certainly don’t need to be told that I’m getting older because my body and the mirror keep reminding me of it. At the same time, I’m still committed to doing the things I love like surfing, tennis and snowboarding at as high a level as I possibly can for as long as I can.

I am fairly certain that my ability to do so thus far has a lot to do with my high level of desire and my not willing to let matter win the battle over mind. The sad truth though, is that as time goes on I’m finding that matter seems to want to keep winning the battle and will most likely get the upper hand more and more.

But one thing is for certain, I’m not giving in without a fight and I’ll try to make the most of those times when mind seems to have been able to get the upper hand.

I have always told myself (don’t we all talk to ourselves?) that when I walk out to the beach and am fearful of paddling out, that I will know that matter has finally won and I will walk away from the sport and hope I can live off the many good memories I have of being a part of perhaps the greatest of activities on the planet.

So in closing, all I can say is “catch me if you can matter”. I hope you can also for as long as you can. Take care, have a great week and I hope to see you back here again soon or out in the surf.

Aloha, Paul

P.S. If you haven’t done so yet please check out my new novel “The Waves of Fate” which deals a bit with mind over matter and how we handle loss and diminished abilities. It, and my other books can be found on Amazon and Amazon Kindle. Thanks

The worry express is an easy train to get on but really difficult one at times to get off of. Worry, just like a train, often starts out slowly then picks up speed as it moves along. Often, if one doesn’t get off at an early stop, it will take you to the last stop called Burnoutville.

I know this route all too well as for many years it seemed like I overthought everything and worried endlessly. I worried about family issues, job situations, money, health, life and death and just about anything I felt I couldn’t or needed to control.

I also worried about forgetting things so I made lists of all of the things I needed to do or worried I might forget. The problem was, I often forgot where I left the list then had to make a new one. At the worst of times I also made a note reminding me to check my list.

During that period of time I found it hard to sleep, eat, operate well at work and at home and all it got me was an express ticket to old Burnoutville which is a pretty crappy destination.

After several visits to that depressing town and ruining my health, I finally figured out that all the worrying I had done most likely didn’t change a thing. As a matter of fact it only made things worse.

After the lightbulb finally went on in my complicated little head I decided to try and overcome my tendency to worry so much. I started by reminding myself that I just simply can’t control everything, that I needed to trust my judgment and intuition more, turn my problems over to my higher power and simply chill the heck out.

Bottom line, some things that we think are so darned important really aren’t and neither are we. Additionally, it seems like the more we try to control things the less control we really have.

Sure I still worry at times. After all I’m only human and besides, it’s probably burned deep within my DNA anyway. The difference now is that once I realize I just boarded the train I try my best to get off at the first stop on the line. I instead skip the list and do something fun like surfing, painting or writing or anything that takes my mind off of the subject and leaves me feeling chilled out.

Then with no lists or excessive worries things seem to turn out pretty well and when they don’t big deal because I probably had little to no control over them anyway.

So if you find yourself getting on the worry express think about why you are worrying in the first place. If it’s something you can control then fix it. If not then try and let it go, get off at the nearest stop and go do something you really enjoy doing and chill out. If you do I’m sure you will be a lot happier.

Thanks for checking in this week. I hope you have a stress free one (well at least as much of one as possible) and I will look forward to seeing you back here again next week.

Aloha, Paul

Last night, after two days of trying to get my newly completed novel “The Waves of Fate” published on Amazon Publishing and Amazon Kindle, I finally was able to get it loaded and approved.

I’d like to say it took so long to do so because of them having a crummy web site but I’d be dishonest if I did so. The problem is that I’m not the greatest at following directions or with technology. I didn’t realize that you couldn’t simply load a word document into one that took another format. First I had to put into a pdf format then get it on a 6×9″ format, then get all the margins just right which continued to have to change as I shrunk the area down in size and the number of pages increased.

All told, it took me about ten mind-bending hours of work and having to continually go through the entire novel to make sure all of the chapter starts were in the right spot. It got to the point where I thought I would never get it right.

The good news is I got it completed and the manuscript was accepted and loaded up on the Amazon site for both print on demand and kindle.

The additional good news in it all is that I learned an awful lot about my computer, publishing, format and so much more.

So why did I go through all of this? Well, as an author of little notoriety there aren’t many, if any, large publishers in this day and age who are willing to give an advance or a contract to folks with little to no notoriety. Many , like me, have gone to contributory publishers or vanity presses who charge for a part of the cost of publishing a work.

Well, first of all, I don’t have that kind of money at the present time and secondly even if I did I wouldn’t go that route again. My first publisher is now defunct and neither that one or the second seems to want to pay royalties that are due.

So even if there still is a stigma to self publishing, which I doubt there should be, I’m perfectly happy with the opportunity I have to have my book published with Amazon Publishing, which, by the way is free.

And although they do not provide any editing services, truth be told, my former publishers didn’t do such a great job anyway and hopefully, after about seven re-writes and edits that I performed myself, I shouldn’t be any worse off anyway.

Thanks for checking in this week and I hope you will at least check out my new novel and if you do read it thanks in advance and please give me your feedback as good or bad it helps me to become a better writer. In the interim I hope you have a great week.

Aloha, Paul

Ok I admit it once again. I am a huge fan of Ernest (Jim Varney) movies. I’ve come to believe the main reason I am is due to his character’s sense of wonderment of the world and things around him.

It’s also one of the reasons I have enjoyed teaching skiing, snowboarding and surfing over the years. Observing the pure excitement and joy that not only youngsters but older folks alike receive from taking part in the lessons always fires the stoke within me also. This is especially so when the individual comes into the lesson with a great deal of trepidation and angst. Overcoming their fears seems to also open them up to other new experiences and provides them with a sense of self and confidence that may have been lacking previously.

I know such experiences have done the same for me over the years. Sure some experiences may not have had such positive results and some may have come with a good deal of pain but in the end I don’t regret having experienced them at all. I believe if I hadn’t then I would be less of who I am because of it. It all comes with a certain degree of risk but without risk there is seldom gain.

I believe that if I was born in the era of the great explorers that I would have wanted to be one also. I love to explore and see and do new things and as Ernest once said “To go where no man had gone before”. Such experiences, I believe, is what keeps us young and vital at least mentally.

All too often we become all too comfortable in our existence and feel we are either too old or unable to try something new. Some just feel safe and secure in the ways we have done things for so long. This can become a trap for us and in the process we can lose that sense of wonderment and become jaded, angry and intolerant of others or think that the ones who are trying new things are being immature or fool-hearty.

In the movie “The Santa Clause”, when Scott Calvin (The newly ordained Santa asks the elf Judy why he can’t believe something he just saw she replied something like “Seeing isn’t necessarily believing and sometimes you have to believe in things you can’t see. Unfortunately many grown ups just stop believing in things.” Bottom line, they lose that sense of magic and wonderment.

My hope is that none of us lose that sense of adventure and wonderment. I believe that if we don’t lose them that we would all be much happier and healthier and the world will be a better place.

If you want to see that sense of joy of wonderment take a close look at the expression on the face of the young student from the Florida School of the Deaf and Blind in the attached photo that was fortunate to have been able to instruct . Now that’s a look of pure stoke and joy if there ever was one.

Thanks for checking in this week. I hope you have a wondrous week and I will look forward to seeing you back here next time.

Aloha

Recently I reread my personal story Chicken of The Sea. It had been a long while since I had last done so and I wanted to revisit what I had written.

I had forgotten that at the end of the book I had written down my wishes for what the future might bring me. I basically said that I wasn’t one to wanted to stay on in a job until retirement just for a watch (not sure companies even do that anymore) and a retirement party. I also said I would like to do more volunteer work, especially in the environmental and surfing arenas, write more, get more involved with my art work, surf more and spend time with family.

I further stated that I didn’t care too much about money, fame and fortune and would be happy as long as we could get by somewhat comfortably.

Well I guess I got what I wished for except for except the money part as things have been pretty much a struggle since I lost my job in industry in 2008. I’ve had numerous temporary jobs since that time and thankfully, along with my wife Kathy’s income until several years ago, we have managed to have  kept a-float thus far.

Despite the financial struggles I couldn’t be happier about the way things turned out. I’ve been able to give back to the sport of surfing through various volunteer surfing  instructional activities, have gotten deeply involved with the local Surfrider Foundation chapter working on helping improve the environment and have had the opportunity to speak to numerous school students about the benefits of Ocean Friendly Gardening.

Although I’m certainly not getting rich from my artistic and writing pursuits, I feel blessed to be able to spend a great deal of time enjoying both activities. I suppose as a surfer I love to express myself artistically and these activities are greatly enriching. Despite the lack of traction I would like to get from these pursuits I try to look at them from the standpoint that even if I touch in a positive way just a few individuals through my art and writing then it is all worth the effort and besides, I never went into either with the idea of getting rich from it in the first place.

And speaking of surfing, I have always wanted to have more time to enjoy the sport and spend more time with family and friends. I certainly have been blessed with those things since losing my job in industry.

Lastly, I had always wanted to work in a surf shop and teach surfing. I have now been afforded such an opportunity.

So I suppose, at least in my case, I got exactly what I had wished for all along. Sure it took some time and there were certainly a lot of twists, turns and bumps in the road along the way but in the end it was certainly worth the wait.

So here’s hoping you get the worthwhile things you wished for and hopefully without all those bumps in the road. And if it doesn’t look exactly like you thought it would I’m sure you’ll be just fine if you embrace what you get.

Thanks for checking in this week and I will look forward to seeing you back here again soon.

Aloha, Paul

P.S. I just found out my publisher Tate Publishing closed it doors this past month. Unfortunately it looks like they left a lot of people including their authors and employees holding the bag. As such my books “Chicken of The Sea” and “Byron The Lonely Christmas Tree” will most likely no longer be available through Amazon and other outlets. Until I can find a new publisher anyone can obtain a copy directly from me. Fortunately I had purchased additional copies for book signing events.